The Gynaecologist - Dr James Ferry
Week by week guide to becoming a Dad

From the very first "I've got something to tell you", to the birth. Each weeks email includes information on:-

  • The growth and development of your baby and partner 
  • Money tips
  • Advice and stories directly from Dads
  • Fun and interesting facts
  • Dads-to-be most frequently asked questions 
  • Glossary of medical terms
  • Gift Ideas for baby and mum
  • Weekly mocktail and easy recipe 
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Although we had been trying for a couple of months when she said the words "I'm pregnant" I still went into a state of panic, fear and overwhelming happiness. I was going to be a Dad.

Hiding the pregnancy when we went out was hard, I felt like I was the one getting all the morning sickness. Night after night of secretly drinking Polly's white wine as well as my own beer made for some shocking hangovers.

During the scan the little babies seemed to be quite active and happily bouncing around walls of my wife's uterus, completely oblivious to the emotional volcano they had just erupted on their parents...twins!

When the gynaecologist referred to my wife as the mother, "It's up to your wife, as the mother to...." I suddenly felt very young to be a father. I had only just got comfortable with calling her "wife" life was moving very fast.

Average age of fathers in Australia is 32.9 years.

The world's oldest recorded father is purported to be Australian mine worker, Les Colley, who was 92 years 10 months when he fathered a son, Oswald, in 1992. "I never thought she would get pregnant so easy, but she bloody well did," he told newspapers at the time, referring to his Fijian wife whom he'd met through a dating agency a year earlier.

The average number of disposable nappies that a child will wear up to the age of 2 1/2 years is 7,350

Stuart C;  New Dad  - Top Tips 

  • Say "yes" to everything
  • Get your finances in order
  • Forget what you read in books and go with what you think is right

Tim C; New Dad - Top Tips

  • Have your nights out whilst you still can
  • Avoid changing the really full ones
  • Get finances organised
  • Enjoy every minute, it's a cliche but it does go fast

Jon R; New Dad - Top Tips

  • Do whatever your partner wants
  • Don't expect everything to go as planned

Matthew H; New Dad - Top Tips

The most important thing that I learnt is that it is all my fault. Everything that she is going through is my fault. It doesn't matter if it's my fault or not, it's easier and makes her feel better if I take the blame. No matter what I get into trouble for I just think it's nothing compared to what she's going through. And if nothing I do makes it better then going to a baby shop and letting her buy something always seams to make things better.

 Mike P; New Dad - Top Tips

  • Don't worry - enjoy
  • It just keeps getting better
  • Take the time to talk to others and read up
  • Don't buy too much

Al G; New Dad - Top Tips

  • Give your partner the benifit of the doubt

Matt O; New Dad - Top Tip

Be loving and present, don't blink cos you'll miss it.

Cameron; New Dad - Top Tip

Try and do all you can to give her a rest when you can. If you get tired after an hour with the baby imagine what it is like after 23.

 Matt P; New Dad - Top Tip

Insist on two weeks paternity leave (I regret having only 1 week after a long and ardous labour it didn't give me long with my son).

 Paul K; New Dad - Top Tip

Enjoy every stage, even when the child is crying - just enjoy! Life is to short to skip any part. Friends are saying how theywhere to busy working and now where the child is >10 and above they are getting to be individuals and don't want hugs and are too busy with their friend (which of course is fantastic) though as parents missed out on a lot of the growing up.

 Marcus C; New Dad - Top Tip

Follow your instincts

Jason P; New Dad - Top Tips

There are a few:-

  • Routine is good
  • Never wake a sleeping baby
  • Just when you think you have sussed it, it changes
  • Teething  - is difficult!

Carl P, New Dad - Top Tip

Nothing can prepare you for labour.

James T; New Dad - Top Tip

Babies just cry, you can be doing everything right and nothing wrong but they will still cry. Its not your fault babies cry.

Mike S; New Dad - Top Tip

Be ready for a big surprise. Talk to friends who have been through it recently.

Andrew K; New Dad - Top Tip

Be understanding and enjoy every moment.

Jeff P; New Dad - Top Tip

Relax and avoid commerical advertising you many not need many of the things on the market. Keep it simple.

Richard B; New Dad - Top Tip

At 30 weeks pack your bags because you never know when it might happen. Learn as much as you can, go to all the classes, open your eyes to  everything that potentially could happen. Spend time with your baby alone.


 

Dr Jim Ferry is incredible, after over 20 years delivering babies he still genuinely shares every couples excitement and happiness. Jim said during the interview, "I feel privileged to share very special moments at a very personal time with people, I never get bored as no two couples are ever the same."

 

 

How many babies have you delivered? 4000

 

How many did you deliver last year? 200+

 

What would you say is the biggest surprise for most men? How well they cope, as well as how overwhelmed they are.

 

One thing all Dads-to-be need to know about birth. Just being there is enough. The positive effect of the Dads presence and support in the room during labour and birth is immeasurable. One Dad stood facing the wall throughout all three of his children’s births, it was enough for the mother.

 

How do you describe the pain of child birth to a Dad - to - be? Trying to poo a melon

 

Worst injury incurred during labour and birth to a man? Fractured scull, Dad happened to be a helicopter pilot, heard a sudden thud – he had fainted and cracked his scull. What did you do? I was busy

 

Would you try to persuade a Dad to attend the birth if he didn’t want to be there? No, because the woman would know that they did not want to be there. The only exception would be if she did not have any other form of support.

 

Funniest things Dad's have said during birth? Had a Dad who was a comedian, he was cracking jokes all the way through.

 

Most inappropriate thing Dads have said during birth? Emotions are running high and often Dad's say things they might not usually say!  They often ask if they can put in an additional stitch at the end.

 

Have any Dads ever fainted? Yes, many

 

Strangest thing men have brought to the delivery room? Laptop full of action movies – sat and watched one after the other the whole way through.

 

What is the strangest request you have ever had? Not to speak after the baby was born. It’s also not uncommon for couples to ask to keep the placenta; they often want to bury it in the garden and then plant a tree over it.

 

In your whole career is there one birth that stands out from the rest which you always remember and why? No one specific birth, but sadly you remember the heart breaking ones. But to counter that when a couple who thought they would never have a baby finally become parents it’s very special and memorable.

 

Quickest birth? One lady who coughed and the baby fell out, another who vomited, and one whilst on the toilet into the bowl!

 

Longest birth? 24 hours – nowadays we don’t let women go any longer than that.

 

Roughly what % of men cut the cord? 80%You have three children - did you deliver them?  No, I was needed for support. I knew I couldn’t be objective.

 

% of men that cry?  Approximately 70%

 

Have you ever had to ask a Dad to leave the delivery suite and why? Yes, he was becoming very abusive and agitated causing the mother distress and so he had to leave.

 

What is your opinion on home birth? Birth is dangerous – with standards so high in Australian hospitals it is hard to replicate the level of care at home which you would receive in a hospital.

 

Water birth? Comforting for labour, baby must be brought out as soon as possible once born as they can not breathe in water. It’s also is a lot more difficult for the Obstetrician to prevent tears.

 

Pain relief? Horses for courses.  Lots of pros and cons for each method.  With epidurals it must be taken into consideration that quite often women have not slept for several nights before the birth, the labour can be long and they are exhausted and feel demoralised about asking for an epidural - the first thing they do once it is in is sleep.  If you see a woman after she has woken after an epidural she shows happiness and relief and has renewed energy to continue.

 

Have you noticed the baby boom? Yes, definitely

 

Do you notice any other interesting trends? More couples are having a third child than they were.

A personal note from the founder of I'm going to be a Dad - Amanda Carroll

I was very fortunate to have Dr Ferry as my Obstetrician for both my children, Oliver and Zoe. I had a history of five unsuccessful pregnancies and so when Tim and I walked into Jim Ferry's office we were terrified.  Dr Ferry shared in our happiness when he found a heart beat and helped us to stay positive and excited throughout my pregnancy.  I will never forget when Dr Ferry felt my stomach and said "Amanda, there's a healthy baby in there, you ARE going to have a baby!"  He looked nearly as happy as we were and I wondered if he was as happy for all his patients?  I have spoken to many of them and I can say the answer is that he is without exception! Thank you Dr Ferry, for your precious time, for your honesty and for bringing my family safely into the world.
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